Anna's guidelines for blogging

Hello, dear readers!  I love all three of you!  Today, I thought I  (or should I say, "We?"  pronouns are so confusing.) would share with you some things that do (or don't) guide my creative process on this blog.  I'd love to hear your ideas that help you with your blogging, as well!  Perhaps you could include some tips for actually imparting meaning to the words you write.  As those of you who have read the preceding paragraph will know, I struggle with that sometimes.

Other topics I would appreciate in your tips include:

>How to cut down on exclamation point usage, while still conveying a highly excited tone.  (Excited is my normal modus operandi.)
>Opinions on the use of parenthesis in blog posts.  Is is good or bad?  Hilarious or distracting?  Oh, and how do you feel about footnotes?  (Personally, I love them.  But not the boring kind that refer you to some source that you're never going to read anyway.  I like the ones that take the place of parenthetical statements, for obvious reasons.)
>Ideas for staying on one subject in blog post.
>Encouragement that I should not stay on one subject in a blog post, so that I can ignore the good advice stemming from the preceding topic.

Please also send your favorite recipe that include avocados with your feedback.  I have a couple on my counter that are dying to be eaten.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, may I present my guidelines for blogging?
I hope the answer is yes, because I'm going to start soon.

*If it is absolutely imperative that you do not read my guidelines, I suggest forcing your computer to shut down right away.  If you're on a PC, this means that you will have the blue screen of death next time you try to turn it on, but since your reasons for not reading must be very unique, my guess is that it's worth it.  Anyway, it's too late for me to do anything to stop you from reading it.*

So, without further ado, (which is a phrase that I don't use often because I find there is usually much more to say.) I present my guidelines for blogging:

(Insert trumpet music here)

Guideline #1:  Everything must be done in a way the glorifies Jesus.  This means that I'm not prideful or hurtful in what I say, and I take every opportunity to give Him credit.

#2:  Chocolate chip cookies are a welcome addition to any writing endeavor

#3:  As with many other things, writing is fun if done with a friend.

#4:  If aforementioned friend is not available, writing is also fun alone.  The advantage here is that I don't have to share the cookies.

#5:  If it isn't fun, I don't write it.  Someone needs to be entertained by what I'm saying, and the only way I can guarantee that that happens is by being that person.

#7:  Keep it unexpected.

#8:  Always, Always, Always edit.

#9: I have to accept the fact that I will have at least one typo magically appear after hitting publish."  I like to call it the ninja typo.  Therefore, #9, stated concisely is, "Do not fear ninja typos."

#10:  Remember this lovely quote from Jon Acuff:

#11:  I do respect other people's opinions about my writing, but I don't want to worry about them.


Due to the somewhat split nature of my personality, as well as the fact that I am hoping for feedback from y'all, there could be a second part to this post.  Perhaps even a third or fourth.  We'll see.
Until then, bonjour!

Q&A with Anna topic: Cats

In order to enable you to be more informed about the author whose blog your reading, the crew at annanorthwrites.blogspot.com is pleased to introduce Anna North as our chief journalist/ interview expert.  Today she will be interviewing Anna North, the author and editor-in-chief of the blog you are currently reading.  We apologize for the confusing format of the interview, and hope that the color-coded speakers bring some clarity to your reading experience.  That is their only purpose.  We do not mean that the Annas literally are that color, unless you have synesthesia, in which case our colors are probably wrong.*

Anna:  It’s so nice to meet you!

Anna:  Well thanks! It’s so nice to meet you too. (I’m not sure exactly who’s talking to who here, but I love meeting new people!)

Anna:  Have I met you before?

Anna:  (Laugh)  You know, the last time someone asked me that, I’m pretty sure it was a pick-up line.

Anna:  I’m so sorry!  I seriously just wondered…  You looked familiar…  Oh, never mind.  I should get to the questions, right?

Anna:  Lol sure… We could keep talking about this, though.

Anna:  Maybe some other time.  

Anna:  Ok.

Anna: By the way, why do you say, “Lol?”  Isn’t that an abbreviation that people use when they’re typing?

Anna:  What do you think I do all day?

Anna:  Good point.  Anyway, what’s your opinion of Cats?

Anna:  They are adorable, fuzzy little creatures. I love them! Actually, come to think of it, I should include a cat in my latest book, the Untitled Adventures of Hazel and Jean. Maybe the Queen of France will have a cat.

Anna:  How many times have you seen it?

Anna:  Lol I see where this is going.

Anna:  So you have seen it?

Anna:  I think that Andrew Lloyd Webber is a man of enormous talent.

Anna:  I think a lot of people would agree with you.  What’s your favorite song of his?

Anna:  You know, Anna, I’m searching my memory, and I can’t think of one.

Anna:  All I ask of you is one song.

Anna:  How am I to know which is my favorite?  I believe in my heart that he’s an angel of music.

Anna:  This is hilarious.

Anna:  Thanks.  I find myself amusing sometimes, too.  In fact, there are days when I lie awake in bed, trying to stop myself from laughing so much at my own jokes.  It really causes a problem, because I can’t get to sleep.  It’s almost as big of a problem as the light streaming through my window.

Anna:  Why are we talking about your sleeping habits?

Anna:  Why not?

Anna: We’re supposed to be talking about Cats.

Anna:  Did you know that cats always land on their feet?

Anna:  Yes, but I was talking about the musical, remember?

Anna:  Oh, I’ve never seen it.

Anna:  You haven’t?

Anna:  Nope.

Anna:  Me either, actually.

Anna:  Oh.  So why were we talking about it?

Anna:  I like conducting interviews about things I don’t know anything about.  That way, I have lots of questions.

Anna:  I guess that’s one way to do it.

Anna:  We have to end the interview now, though, since you can’t answer my questions.

Anna:  Why?  We have lots of other things to talk about:  pick-up lines, my wonderful sleeping habits, opera…

Anna:  You want to talk about opera?

Anna:  Actually, I was thinking that I could phone a friend on that one.  I don’t know anything about that, either.  Except, of course, that it isn’t over until the fat cat sings.

Anna:  I don’t think that’s quite right.

Anna: So? You already admitted that you don’t know anything about cats.

*  If you are unfamiliar with synesthesia and the preceding sentence made absolutely no sense to you, you probably don't have it.  If you are a curious type**, however, you can check out The Colors That Color My World.  It's a blog by Anna's dear friend, Molly, who has synesthesia and records her experiences of it there.  There are also some links to actual definitions of synesthesia, which I am not going to duplicate here because
1) I am lazy
2) It really is a cool blog and you should check it out.
**  A further note to curious types:  Be careful.  Curiosity killed the cat.***
***  A further note to my friends:  I'm sorry for the cliche.  I just couldn't control myself.  I hope you will understand.

Maybe I Should Explain.

Hi, my name is Molly, but some know me as half of Anna North. Right now, those "some" make up a very small percentage of the US population. In fact, it's such a small percentage, my calculator errors out when I try to find the number (6 in 313,900,000).

But nonetheless, I am Molly, aka 1/2 of Anna North. The other 1/2 of Anna's brain resides in the head of my dear friend, Julianne. No, we are not zombies. Anna North is our brainchild (haha no pun intended!). The story goes as follows:

A long time ago, in a land not so far away, Molly and Julianne came up with the brilliant idea to combine brain efforts and construct literature collectively, which is just a fancy way of saying they wanted to co-write books. Because they were creative girls, and didn't want to go with the traditional method of signing both of their names to the covers of these books, they decided it was time to employ a pen name.

Names were tossed around like a pizza chef tosses the dough in the air. For a first name, Molly and Julianne chose Anne, because it was the end of Julianne's name and Molly's middle name was Ann. A last name idea was Rice, because they both thought it was a cool name. However, Julianne's mom pointed out that Anne Rice was not a good name because it was the name of an author who wrote books about Vampires, and they wouldn't want to be confused for her.

Molly and Julianne decided on the last name North. Because we are on the internet and I can't reveal this detail about Molly and Julianne's lives (for fear of stalkers), I will just say that the name North closely applies to both of their lives. If you know either of the aforementioned girls, feel free to ask them about this in person.

The name Anne North was liked, but was changed to Anna North. I can't remember exactly why, but I feel like it was because we thought the name Anne North ran together too much and Anna North would help distinguish between last and first name.

And this, my dear readers, is how Anna got her name. Thanks for reading, and hope to hear your thoughts in the comments below!!

So the blog idea is born...